I had an epiphany the other day. I realized that things do not have to be wrong to be right. What I mean by that is simply that. Some people are so used to having drama in their lives that that becomes their reality so when there is nothing wrong, they are uneasy, unsure, and THINK something is wrong when in fact, everything is right.
When we work to make our lives drama free, we get into a space of discomfort. We are unsteady because as things become peaceful, they also become unfamiliar and we all can agree that unfamiliar is uneasy. However, what if we consider the possibility that our uneasiness is the symptom of a bigger, more positive root cause………PEACE.
I recognized recently that my life is completely peaceful. Like any adult life, there are things that we don’t want to deal with but they are still “normal”. I do not have a crisis that I have to handle. Once you remove a cancer, it can not grow. I will not let cancer in my life. I have surrounded my life with positive, supportive, and encouraging people and the others may be there but they will not be in the front row. I have thrown them in the back and in the balcony so I do not have to be bothered with their need for negativity. They are more than welcome to witness my progression and growth but they will not steer my course. I am finally on the right road and the wrong people have no place in my journey except as bystanders. Here’s something else to consider. What example are you setting for your children? You are their example. Equip them with a clear roadmap. They will ultimately make their own mistakes and blaze their own trail but you can give them the tools to travel safely and guide them to their destiny, whatever that is.
I challenge you to think about the people in your life and the role they play. Do they feed you? Are they keeping you from something you really want? Are they respectful of you regardless of the life you’ve led or do they hold a debt over your head that you could never pay back in their eyes because unwittingly, they are envious of your fire and new strength?
MONDAY: Make a list of those people. Divide your page in two and add these two headers – “Value Added” on one side and “Benchwarmer” on the other. Think about EVERYONE! Family, friends, colleagues, mentors, no one is exempt! Take the time and have that conversation with yourself!
Then decide. Are you going to let the cancers in your life fester and grow until they have eaten away at your soul? Or, are you going to face that cancer head on and say – I WANT TO LIVE!
TUESDAY: Instead of looking at what’s wrong, take a look at what is working in your life. Make a list of all the things that are right in your life, even if the only thing that is working is that you are able to brush your teeth everyday.
WEDNESDAY: Now that you can see all the things that are right in your life, look at the things that can be better. How would you like to change those things? Again, don’t get caught up in your head about your money or time or circumstances in regards to changing them, just do you want to change it, YES or NO! Make a list of the things you’d like to change.
THURSDAY: Now only tackle ONE thing on your wrong list. Now is the time to be critical but in a good way. Remember, look at each issue and determine what is needed to make it happen. Do not start with “I don’t have….” Forget current, money, time, or circumstances, just focus on what you need to make it happen. If it is money, be specific, how much exactly. You may have to do a little homework. If time is required, how much time will it take to complete? Start slow, if this is all you can handle, that is fine. If you are feeling inspired and encouraged, continue down your list of issues and map out each one.
FRIDAY: So what have you accomplished this week? This week you have realized that all the work you’ve done so far is working. You are noticing that you are less stressed and your life has less drama and that is RIGHT! You have also mapped out an action plan to attack the things that can be better. Keep all of your lists together in your journal and revisit them. Put things on your calendar to work toward completion. Congratulations – You have earned your TREAT DAY! Enjoy the work you are doing.
Remember - Everyday we have a new chance to live a better, stronger, more fulfilling life. Everyday is not promised. Don’t miss your chance.
Quote for the Week - Sometimes you've got to let everything go—purge yourself . . . If you are unhappy with anything . . . whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you'll find that when you're free, your true creativity, your true self comes out. Tina Turner (1939-)
I, Tina (1986)
